Planning A Budget Wedding In Times Of Recession

Planning a wedding can be a very stressful time as there are so many things to prepare for at the best of times. In this time of economic downturn and impending recession the stress factor is multiplied many times over.

I don’t want to sound disheartened or unenthusiastic but once you say “I do”there are lots of expenses you need to consider for example the Engagement Dinner, Rings, Pre Education Program, Ceremony, Wedding Dress, Grooms Attire, Bridal Party attire, Flowers, Wedding Stationary, Photography, Video, Car Hire, Reception, Bomboniere, Caterers, Cake, Master of Ceremony, Music, Honeymoon, Hair, Makeup, Hens Night/ Bucks Night, Residence and the list goes on. The media now advertises that the average cost of a wedding is $49,000. This becomes an enormous expense to a young couple or couples family who want to experience their "dream wedding".

Money Matters

Most of the time you will be busy organising all these things, but another important aspect of your new life together is how you will handle your finances as a couple. Do you continue to operate separate bank accounts (i.e. have divorced finances) or do you combine finances? If you have purchased a home together and need to make repayments or service a home loan then it’s probably easier to open a joint account. There are also other household bill like gas, water, rates and shopping that will be a shared expense. It’s a bit hard to say “I’ll pay for my half out of my account and you pay for yours”. The other alternative is to transfer money from your account into your partners but this becomes very time consuming and if you forget one month your partner may incur overdrawing fees on his or her bank account. I think that once you because a couple the time has come to opened a joint account. Whether or not you close your existing accounts is entirely up to you but it does make life a little easier if you operate from the one account.

There are many advantages to opening a joint bank account. For example you only have to monitor one account, there’s no need to transfer funds to and fro, there are less bank fees and if it is a high interest earning account you may receive more interest because you have a higher balance. But having a joint account requires a lot of commitment, trust and you must not be a careless or selfish spender otherwise it will lead to questions and arguments. The other alternative is to open a joint account but not close your own self titled accounts.

The down side to opening a joint account is that your partner becomes fully aware of all the purchases you make. For example, trips to the hairdressers, work lunches, new clothes and new appliances just to name a few. You may find it difficult to adjust your spending habits especially when you have been financially independent for so long. But what happens when you still want to visit your hairdresser every month or buy that new computer game? Personal purchases can easily start fights within the relationship especially when one partner uses more of the family savings than the other. I’d be pretty upset, if I was trying to save towards "our future" as a couple and I saw my partner going off to the hairdressers every month for a new colour or off to buy yet another expensive accessory for the computer. And the last thing you want to do in the relationship is to put your partner off by using the money as a sign of power in the relationship. If it comes down to this, then you really need to sit down together and discuss the spending boundaries and revisit your family budget.

The solution to maintaining a joint account efficiently may mean that you have to have three accounts. Your individual accounts and then the joint account. If you choose this avenue then it is important that you create a personal budget and only use the account for spousal expenses. Work out your net wage for the week and decide on a certain percentage to allocate together. For example 70% of your wage can be directly transferred to the joint account and the remainder is left for you to do what you want, no questions asked. The remaining cash can be added to your own personal savings, your superannuation or you can purchase personal items for yourself. But if you do decide to split your finances this way there needs to be a rule in place so that no matter what your partner brings home you will not scrutinise, comment or judge his or her purchase.

The down side to having a joint bank account is that one partners idea of what is a spousal expenses may not be yours and also one partner may dip into the joint account once they have depleted their own funds.

Wedding Expenses

Even the most modest of weddings can cost you about $15,000-$20,000. Along with the celebration comes the expense and some people spend their entire lives planning for a wedding day, not to mention their life savings. I knew this elderly couple whose son was getting married. They needed to keep up appearances with their relatives. Instead of opting for an intimate wedding they could afford they chose to have the "big show" so they took out a personal loan to finance it. The son is now married but took the parents few years to pay off the loan. My point here is that this family could have had a smaller wedding with no associated debt but they chose to have a bigger wedding and so came along the bigger expense.

Weddings don’t have to break the bank as long as you buy what you can afford. A acquaintance of mine was in a live in relationship with her partner whom she desperately wanted to marry. She also wanted the big fairy tale wedding but her partner knew he could not oblige. She resented him because she saw all her friends celebrating their weddings with a big bang. When she spoke to me about it she said “As a little girl, I have always dreamed of the big ball like wedding, I want to be a princess for the day”. My opinion was that not everybody could afford such a big celebration and maybe she should compromise and have something smaller with her immediate family and a few close friends, that way she could still celebrate her special occasion. She disagreed. Personally I think a big wedding is a waste of money, why anyone would want to have one hundred guests or more at a wedding I will never know. I have attended many weddings in my time and one of the most ridiculous was one that had over 400 guests. The couple didn't even get a chance to spend time with their invited guests.

Everybody’s concept of a dream wedding varies. The most important thing is that you enjoy yourself on the day. You want to be able to experience the day and not be bogged down by formalities. I find the best weddings are the smaller weddings. Some of the best weddings I’ve been to have only had 20 people. The couple got to speak to all their guests whilst having lunch. They did not compromise on food or attire and the celebration was much more intimate. My belief is that simple is best.

Tip on how to save on wedding expenses

• Have a friend make the wedding cake or buy a plain marzipan cake. Fruit cakes are very simple to make. If you are happy with a very plain cake then you can even make it yourself. Once you have put the icing on the cake you can dress it with a bride and groom topper.
  
• Consider using the family home to host the wedding.
  
• Reduce the amount of people, only invite people you keep in touch with or matter most in your lives.
  
• Organise your own wedding instead of using a wedding planner.
  
• Employ student services e.g. musicians.
  
• Customise your wedding to what you want, not what is expected.
  
• Have wrist corsages for the bridesmaids instead of flowers bouquets.
  
• Hand out a few cameras to friends and employ the photographer for the formal shots only.
  
• Have friends or family take video, it won’t look as staged.
• Just as the groom buys a suit and wears it again, the bride can choose a formal dress that can be worn again.
  
• If you have a small gathering consider having your reception at a restaurant.
  
• Very expensive weddings are for couples with more money than good sense. Cut down on your guests and put the money towards a home loan deposit.
  
• Stick to a budget.
  
• Ask your guests to pay for their own lunch instead of giving a gift.
  
• Choose a beautiful garden or mansion as your backdrop eg. University this will save on decorations as the location is beautiful in itself.
  
• Do away with the bridal party and have 2 witnesses instead.
  

Many couples live together before they marry these days, so by the time they do decide to tie the knot they will have already bought what they needed for the household. One way to avoid receiving duplicate gifts or gifts you don’t like is by opting for a bridal registry or asking for a money pool (wishing well). The money pool can be anonymous so people can put in what they can afford. If for example you have invited 50 guests and they each contribute at least $50, then you will have raised $2500 in cash. This can be put towards something you really need for the household regardless of whether you choose to buy small item such as a kettle or larger items such as a bed.